When watch collecting is a problem.

Watch collecting being an illness or an addiction is often spoken about with a very jovial attitude in our community. To a degree I think it’s a good thing that we can be light-hearted about the absurdity of obsessing over these trinkets, but it doesn’t help those who may genuinely be struggling with the hobby.

When I’ve seen people try to bring it up in a serious way they tend to be met with comments of ‘Only spend what you can afford’, ‘stick to a budget’ and at times comments can come with an undertone of judgemental attitude.

It’s really hard to stick your hand up and admit you’re struggling.

And this is even more the case with men, who are notorious for not wanting to admit weakness in front of their peers.

I have hope that this may be changing for the younger men of today, who are being reassured that ‘It’s ok to not be ok’, but when you think about the demographic of the watch collecting community, it still has a large proportion of men from the ‘stiff upper lip’ generation.

This isn’t to say women aren’t affected by problems with watch collecting or problem spending, it’s just a matter of men making up the greatest demographic in our community.

As welcoming, inclusive and connected as our community is, it is not a great place for those who are struggling with excessive collecting and spending.

Buying several watches each month, week, or even in a day, is not questioned. It’s even applauded by many, and made light of.

And the difficulty is, that’s how it should be!

No one wants to go to an enthusiast’s collecting forum and be told “You’re buying too much!”.

Everyone has free will to do with their money as they please and without criticism (which is a good job, considering the type of watches I buy!). Watch forums wouldn’t be a fun place if the first question anyone asked when you posted a new watch was “Are you sure you can afford that?”.

We come to forums for some light-hearted chat, not to dwell on our finances, and this is why conversations about the less pleasant side of the hobby can be met with eye rolls.

We are all happy to just live in our own bubble of normalising our ridiculous watch buying habits. And it’s in everyone’s interests to tow that line.

Enthusiasts cheer on others spending so they don’t feel as bad about their own.

YouTubers and others on social media have a vested interest in people staying engaged in the hobby.

Anyone linked to selling watches of any kind is never going to say anything to people off spending more money.

Now, I am not a psychologist or a psychiatrist, but I do see many patients who struggle with their mental health, and see firsthand how this can effect their spending.

Although people occasionally talk about problem watch collecting in terms of hoarding or OCD, I would say it would be more closely linked to Compulsive Buying Disorder (CBD)

Compulsive Buying Disorder in watch collecting.

CBD is a relatively new diagnosis in psychology, and there is even some push back against it being a diagnosis at all. There are those that say it is over-medicalising the societal wide issue of simple over consumption, but actually there are destinct differences between over spending and compulsive spending.

The main characteristics of compulsive spending is that it feels irresistible. Like the pull of an addiction. The act of spending triggers a Dopamine high which is frustratingly short lived, and like other types of addiction, escalating by spending more and more on each occasion, can be a pattern with time.

With CBD there are more negative than positive feelings experienced after a purchase, such as regret and shame, and the item may never really have been wanted in the first place, ending up unopened and unused.

Frequently the obsessive desire to spend is routed in a need to find relief from feelings of depression, anxiety, boredom or low self-esteem.

So, how do we know if we have a problem with our watch buying?

There are a few things that we can all look out for in order to keep us mindful about our collecting and ensure it doesn’t become an issue.

This list is not all inclusive, and ultimately, if you are starting to feel uncomfortable about your collecting or spending, then listen to your gut and take some time to reflect.

Watch collecting and spending red flags:

• Spending a significant portion of your income on watches.
• Accumulating significant debt due to watch buying.
• Continually buying watches despite resolutions to stop.
• Hiding purchases from loved ones.
• Being more excited about making the purchases than owning the items; you might feel a letdown or a sense of shame after purchasing something.
• Not using or enjoying the watches you purchase.
• Experiencing relationship problems due to your watch buying.
• Feeling ashamed of your spending.
• Feeling like the next big watch purchase is the one that will really improve your life.
• Using spending to manage unpleasant emotions such as depression, anxiety, or low self-esteem.

It’s strange that a few points on this list are actually widely accepted as just normal for the territory of watch collecting!

The key point in my mind is when the overall process begins to bring negative feelings as well as positive ones, that’s the time to have a serious look at things

If you feel you have a serious problem with your spending on watches then seek help. This would best done through the form of counseling (you can access this through the NHS in the UK) but there are also many self-help books on tackling compulsive spending, so go check out Amazon (yes, I see the irony in telling you to buy something to help with your overspending).

You may find disconnecting from social media helpful, but in other instances it can actually help to stay connected to others in the watch community, and perhaps find other ways to enjoy the hobby rather than repeated watch buying.

Continue to enjoy watches, but remember to take care of yourself.

Kaysia

References:

“A review of compulsive buying disorder” – Donald W. Black

“Compulsive Spending: What You Need to Know”- Psychologytoday.com