This is the Fossil Belmar three-hand date black stainless steel watch. It’s the very first watch I ever bought, believe it or not, at the not-so-tender age of 42.
I didn’t know anything about watches. I had a general idea of specific brands like Omega, Rolex, and TAG Heuer but I wasn’t interested in getting them. I didn’t understand why anyone would want an expensive watch. The 200 dollars I paid for the Fossil was the most money I ever paid for an accessory at the time. Ah, if my naive younger self only knew…
Being new to the world of watches, I didn’t know I had inadvertently broken every “rule” in my eventual mental rulebook of watch collecting with the Fossil purchase. As far as I was concerned, I just bought a watch, that’s it. My mental rulebook didn’t exist back then. Let’s see:
It’s too big with a case diameter of 44mm. I would eventually only prefer watches under 40mm. But when I wore it, it seemed to fit just right.
It was a quartz, which I thought then was superior to automatic or mechanical. To be honest, I didn’t even know there was such a thing as automatic or mechanical. And when I first heard of such concepts, I thought that quartz was preferred, it’s more technologically advanced, after all. Now I myself am too snobbish against quartz. I still have them but they don’t hold the same reverence as mechanical.
It’s not you, it’s me.
Its all-black aesthetics I once thought made it chic instead of kitsch.
It’s a fashion watch, which I had no conception of until years later. I had thought Fossil was a reputable watch brand. They had boutique shops after all and sold more than just watches. I thought that was a clear sign of quality.
It’s a sports watch with a 50 meter water resist rating. I had no idea what a sports watch was or why I needed more than 50 meters of water resistance.
When I finally got into watch collecting, I had to give it away as it no longer had any place in my life or collection.
It’s not you, it’s me.
The person I gifted the watch to brought it with her at a family outing a couple of weeks ago. I took the opportunity to borrow it and snapped a few pictures with it. To steal a line from a song by a Filipino artist named Joey Albert: I remember the watch but I don’t remember the feeling anymore. I was happy to see it but I couldn’t bear to wear it. It felt all sorts of wrong even though it used to be all sorts of right. Ignorance, as they say, is bliss. Ignorance of socially constructed rules doubly so. I loved this watch until knowledge of the “rules” spoiled it for me.
Thinking about where I came from and where I am now in relation to watches, instead of feeling fulfilled and somewhat educated, I worry that I’ve regressed somehow. The Fossil was a watch and I treated it like a watch. I wanted, I bought, I wore. Finito. End of story. Now, buying watches has become… complicated. I don’t need to tell you how complicated buying a watch is now. The stakes are somewhat higher, the options more paralyzing, the technical considerations wider.
Not just buying though. Even wearing a watch had become complicated. When I had the Fossil I only had the one watch, which also made wearing it easier. I got up in the morning, took a shower, wore the watch and forgot about it. These days, it’s not so easy. I have to think about what kind of day it’s going to be–should I wear something more casual or sporty or formal? Rectangular or circular? If rectangular, which one? If circular, which one? What color? Should I replace the strap? If so, which one? Which other watches should I bring with me, if at all? I have that fancy dinner I need to go to tonight but I’ll be in the field all day today. Should I bring a dress watch with me? Oh but I can’t just leave it in the car because I’ll be parked outside in direct sunlight I’m afraid it might get cooked inside the glove compartment.
Growing a collection is a bigger responsibility than just adding pieces to a watch box. Some enthusiasts would insist on just buying what catches one’s fancy. Buy buy buy. But I’ve already written before that I’m not interested in aimless consumerism. Buying just for the sake of and without purpose is a waste of limited AND diminishing resources.
The idea of a one-watch collection appeals the more I remember how I once-upon-a-time dealt with the Fossil. Or, more accurately, how I didn’t have to deal with it. I know that calling one watch a collection is perhaps oxymoronic. However, language has dexterity and a one-watch collection is not as grammatically egregious as one might think.
Back to the Fossil: these days when I window shop for watches, I skip the Fossil boutiques. I can only surmise that it’s the watch snob in me. It’s not you, it’s me. The brand’s watches can be attractive given certain caveats and how I wish I could still love it like I once did back when I was an innocent. Zodiac is now owned by the Fossil Group, which I suppose gives Fossil some watchmaking credibility. But methinks not. Instead, perhaps the opposite is true. Instead of Zodiac pulling Fossil up, Fossil ended pulling Zodiac down. This is an unfair commentary, I know.
So seeing the old watch again, somehow forgotten until it’s not, I can’t help but compare the experience to seeing an ex-lover in the street. It’s nice to reminisce about past adventures, catch up on what’s been going on with the other person. Ultimately, though, after all the niceties and smiles and hugs, you wish each other the best of luck, go your separate ways and continue your lives without the other. Whatever shortcomings they may have had in the past, you forgive and you forget and you move on. It’s sad and joyful all at once.
It’s not you, it’s me.
The Escapement Room 